Escape from reality is something we often do without realizing it. There are many escape routes and some are less noticeable than others. We don’t always run away from things physically, but sometimes we develop behaviors that fulfill that function, even if it doesn’t seem so at first sight.
The negative of escaping reality is that it ultimately only leads to self-deception . We can get to the idea that a problem or a vacuum is not there, but if they really are, sooner or later they will come to pass; In addition, not assuming these problems only leads to their growth, often without control.
Likewise, that desire to escape from reality often leads us to develop harmful behaviors for ourselves and others .
Without realizing it, the eagerness not to face reality causes us to hide behind maladaptive behaviors that do not solve what we want to avoid and, instead, generate new problems for us. The following are some of those behaviors.
1. Have what you don’t have yet
This is a way to escape from the reality that refers us to an illusory world. It is the world of “if this happened, that would be resolved . ” So, the problem, for example, is not to solve the employment situation and increase income, but to buy the lottery to solve things at once.
Nor is the problem exploring what is behind sadness and loneliness , but waiting for that person we dream of to arrive, for the person we love to change or for “something to happen” to get us out of that state. It is the world of waiting for something that will hardly happen, so as not to take care of what actually happens to us.
2. Depend on others, a way to escape from reality
Another way of escaping one’s own reality is by subjecting it to the reality of others. There are two ways to do it. One, the most common, is holding others responsible for what happens to us. The problem is the couple, who does or does not do; or of the boss, who demands or does not demand; or from the family, which is this way or another, and so on.
It is as if the person believed that it is a simple toy in the hands of others. As if it had no place for minimal autonomy.
The other path of dependency is to cling to someone specifically and delegate responsibility for our destiny to that person. So we don’t have to confront our mistakes or problems.
3. Invent justifications
It is also very common to choose the way to escape from reality looking for fictitious justifications for what happens to us. The favorites are fate or bad luck. This, of course, would be beyond our control and that is why we cannot do anything about it.
There are also cases in which we cling to our own weaknesses to justify disinterest or lack of decision to face our mistakes and gaps . ” I am temperamental, ” some say to avoid his lack of commitment to the elaboration of his anger; or the ” I don’t know about that ” that is used to evade progress. There are hundreds of formulas like that.
4. Oversize the facts
Increasing the severity of some problems sometimes serves the purpose of circumventing others . There are those who, for example, marry a radical pessimism and use it as an excuse for not growing up. Apparently, the world is so bad that it is not worth trying to improve it by making your own efforts.
Sometimes, also the couple, a child, the mother or work become a kind of nest of evils. All attention is focused on one of those realities and any triviality in that area becomes a catastrophe . This is also a way to escape from reality, creating a smoke screen.
5. Postpone the important
Leaving for later begins as a way of managing time, which becomes a custom in those who want to escape from reality. They put things off just when they start to get difficult , or when they demand more than usual.
Postponing things indefinitely is a way to get them out of the mind without experiencing guilt for it . We know deep down that the right thing is to address them, but we choose to avoid the situation and that is how we create a long chain of slopes that we do not know how to start solving.
We try to escape from reality when we are not clear about how to deal with it or we feel that the tools we have are not enough to do so . We are almost always wrong on this.
Half of the problems are already solved when we decide to face them and others whether we reflect on them we can solve them or at least face them so that they affect us as little as possible. Of course, we will always get great lessons and fruits if we do.