Any event, however simple, arouses very different emotions. This is because a large part of our brain, the Limbic System, takes care of them and makes emotions so ingrained to the nature of the human being that we can consider that they are part of us and our way of reacting to the world.
Each of the memories that make up our life story has an emotional charge associated with it, and there is nothing that makes us feel more alive than emotions. Perhaps for this reason, one of its great representative icons is the figure of the heart, the organ that maintains our lives. Emotions make us get the best of us, but they can also bring out the worst in our being, and by this, I don’t mean only negative emotions such as anger or fear, because even an excessive burden of positive emotions like joy can lead us to euphoria and with it to the lack of control of our behavior.
For this reason almost none of our emotions evades the filter of consciousness. If we take into account that we continually feel, we will easily recognize that people also continually channel or repress our feelings, so we all have a certain emotional control that we execute automatically and therefore unconsciously. But despite this control we have, partly learned and partly written in our genetic material, all people at some time in our lives have felt altered or out of control due to our emotional experiences.
The feelings and emotions are creating- We all know that feelings alter our thinking. In fact, many of the psychological and psychiatric disorders often arise as the result of a disproportionate emotional response that the person is unable to master. In the 30s of the last century, psychoanalyst Franz Alexander discovered that people who repress their feelings had high blood pressure permanently.
The repressed emotions become overwhelming seeking to be released and produce sychosomatization, which consists in the expression of the psychological through physical symptoms so that the body also becomes ill. But the key to getting along with our emotions is also not to suppress them, because not repressing them in any way can lead to other types of disorders even more serious, and get you into more of a mess than you can regret. In this sense, I want to recommend that you read the article by Bertrand Regader, called “The 10 essential rules to release emotional ballast”, where you will learn other techniques to manage your emotions.
We can neither disconnect nor choose our emotions, but we can try to lead them through emotional control, which should not be understood as a form of repression of emotions, but as a way to regulate them, and thus be able to modify our mood and sentimental state, when necessary. The objective of the control techniques is to avoid that when a negative emotion is triggered, we drag and express it in an overflowing way that we can later regret. Here are some techniques to help you control your emotions and feelings.
Non-cognitive techniques to regulate emotions
Although psychologists do not like to prescribe avoiding or fleeing situations (the avoidance and flight coping style is not very effective in solving problems), in the case of controlling negative emotions, I, like many other colleagues, I will make an exception and I will explain that the first and simplest emotional control technique is to learn to avoid what generates negative emotions, whether people or situations, such as trying to avoid a person who overwhelms us every time we see it, not to go to an event that we know our ex-partner is going to attend, or if we are on a diet, avoid having forbidden food, for example.
Deep breathing techniques
Another of the simplest and most useful techniques to control both emotions and physiological reactions, before, during and after facing emotionally intense situations, is deep breathing. On the one hand, because it oxygenates our organs and makes the brain work better, and on the other hand because it relaxes and thereby calms us down.
There are multiple techniques to perform it, a well-known one is to perform the phases of breathing by counting, this count can be varied since we all have different breathing rates and it is not about forcing the breath, the idea is to find the number that best suits ours.